Carmen Staaf
“Birds in Two”
The Suite is inspired by the events and emotions I experienced this year. 'March of 2020' refers both to the month the pandemic suddenly changed all of our lives (at least here in the US) as well as to the feeling that the year was marching inexorably toward illness, loss, and sadness, while at the same time my own life felt repetitive and constrained. The piece is cyclical, as we spent so many months trying to curb the virus, only to see recurring spikes and feel like we had arrived back at the beginning again. 'Birds' is based on a recording of birdsong near my house, from one of my spring walks. While I couldn't travel or hear live music anymore, I became more attuned to the sounds of nature in my own neighborhood. 'For Ruth's Children' refers to the killings of Black Americans by police this year (and in previous years); the title is based on a practice suggested by the meditation teacher Ruth King (founder of the Mindful of Race Institute) - mindfulness has been an important practice for me this year in working with both the anxiety of the pandemic and the awareness of my own socialization into white supremacy. A large part of this year for me has involved the continual process of educating myself about, and fighting against, the systemic racism and white privilege from which I benefit. 'For Henry and McCoy' is for just two of the many, many great jazz (and other) musicians we lost this year. McCoy was an enormous influence on me, and Henry Grimes was someone with whom I had the honor and incredible luck of getting to play music several times, and even more importantly, sharing moments of friendship. 'Tomorrow' is an aspiration toward a future that gradually gets better, even if it's only a little bit each day. Despite how dark things have felt for much of this year, there is so much that is hopeful - the political changes, the vaccines, and the new consciousness that seems to be arising in many people about the ways we need to change how we are treating each other and the planet. Both my fears and my hope for this better future are contained in the last movement, as I try to keep the faith and find a way forward.